A New Year's Letter

December 31st, 2013 Dear Sara,

At 22 weeks pregnant you are still feeling pretty good. It's bitter cold out but tonight you will go out with your husband for a romantic dinner and randomly wander into a raging party where you are the only sober (and preggers) person. Try to have a good time. Dance a little. Doug really wants to dance.

The rest of your pregnancy will be a little hard on you. You will continue to hate getting bigger. Go easy on yourself, it is all worth it. Very, very worth it. And yes, you will be able to spin right up until you give birth. Don't be mad when Laurie moves you out of the front row, it's for your own good you crazy lady! And yes, the swelling in your feet will go away. And yes the pain in your ribcage will stop. And yes and yes and yes.

By the time your baby shower rolls around you will be DONE. Swollen feet and huge belly aside try and enjoy the party. All of your very best friends will be there celebrating you and Hermione (no body knows her name yet but I do!). Also, don't bother buying those 4.5" Jimmy Choo heels a size up so you can shove your pregnant feet into them…you still won't last more than an hour in them.

38 weeks and one day into your pregnancy you will decide to get dressed up and go out for lunch with your mom and sister. Your mom will tell you how beautiful you look pregnant. Listen to her. Listen to everyone who tells you you look beautiful pregnant. You do.

That night at midnight your water will break and you will go into fast and furious labor. You will do the whole thing completely drug free as you wanted. It will be hard, harder than even you imagined. The pain will be mind numbing but you will do it. You will think you can't but you will do it. Just trust Doug and Amy and Dr. Worth, they will get you through. Give into your body and trust it to do it's job. Your body is amazing.

At 1:41 pm on April 27th after 2.5 hours of excruciating pushing Hermione will be born. From the second she is placed on your chest your life will never be the same. You never truly knew love before this moment.

Nursing will be hard at the beginning. Don't give up. She will figure it out. She is little and nursing is hard work for her. When she is about four weeks old it will all click and you two will have the most wonderful, beautiful nursing relationship.

Your first summer as a family will be magical. Doug will have all of July and August off and you will spend it in a baby filled haze together. Enjoy the warm days at the beach. Don't panic when she wakes up every two hours overnight. Don't try and do too much. Just love your baby and the new family you have created.

Be easy on your body in the months following Hermione's birth. Your body will eventually go back to something that resembles your old self (plus giant nursing boobs) but it won't happen overnight. Sometime around mid September your jeans will fit perfectly again. Come the winter you will be back in your leather leggings. Your shoes will also all fit again. I promise.

2013 will be a magical year for you if you let it. Enjoy your pregnancy as much as you can. It is temporary. Enjoy those sleepless early days with a newborn. They are fleeting and she will grow quickly. Enjoy nursing her in the middle of the night. Soon enough she will sleep all (most) of the night and strange as it sounds you will miss her and your quiet, dark nursing sessions deeply. Enjoy all of the music classes, swim lessons, trips to the swings, and play sessions on the floor. She will change every day so make sure to take it all in…even if all you really want is a shower and a meal you can eat with two hands.

It's December 31st again and you are laying in your bed writing this while an eight month old Hermione naps in your arms. All the cliches are true. She is you sun and your moon. You are now one of those people who has their baby as their Facebook photo. Embrace it. When you feel exhausted just wait for her to smile or laugh at you or give you big wet baby kisses. She is hands down the best thing you have ever done in your life.

Happy New Year! 2013 is going to be a big one for you.

Love, Sara